This is not the article you think it is. Please read on.
There has been quite a bit of attention drawn to Simon Biles’s decision to opt-out of competing for the Olympics due to putting her mental health first. And, so many people stepping up to support her in what was without a doubt, an unfathomably difficult decision.
“I truly do feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders”
I have an enormous amount of empathy for what she is going through. I can relate on certain levels from playing college basketball and feeling the weight of the pressure that I put on myself. But, obviously this is an entirely different level. The world stage. The elite of the elite.
While I do think this is a massive step in the conversation around mental health, here’s what we are not talking about.
When we base our identity, self-worth, and mental health on our performance — whatever arena that is — we are placing that identity on the line every single day.
Whether that’s running our sales organization, leading a business, or how we perform on the court — we are betting on outcomes we don’t actually control.
So where do we place our identity?
Our essence is one option. Our essence does not shift. Our essence does not change. Our essence is unshakeable and is far beyond any performance we could deliver.
The challenge is that we are conditioned by our culture that we need to always do more, become more, and achieve more in order to give ourselves permission to feel good about ourselves. To accept ourselves. I can’t even imagine how much of this has been unconsciously imprinted into her belief systems from a very young age. And, our ego is always reinforcing these beliefs until we are fully and unequivocally aligned with our essence. Which only comes with massive patience, self-awareness, and practice.
I’m not saying the relentless pursuit of greatness is a bad thing. But, I am saying tying our mental health to the outcomes of that pursuit is a dangerous slippery slope. I love the journey. I love the pursuit of human potential and leveraging that to create impact. I think it is one of the most fulfilling things in life. But, the goal should be on the process, the learning, and the growth.
In no way, shape or form am I implying that she should or should not have made this decision. I can’t even imagine the inner turmoil in making this decision and I’m in no position to judge either way. I’m simply offering a perspective a layer deeper than the decision that we rarely talk about. I’d be willing to bet there are a lot of visionary leaders, high-performers, and world-class athletes that can relate.
The ironic part is this. When we can drop our need to obtain our identity from our external accomplishments, the pressure disappears, and we can drop into the present moment. Which is the only place we connect our boots on the ground strategy to a vision greater than our current reality.
How does this relate to business performance?
When leaders create psychological safety, connection and trust they allow their people to rest in their essence.
Our essence is in our humanity.
And, we need business to be more human than ever.
